How to Listen Well

When in conflict, do you approach colleagues or family with a spirit of curiosity?

What a huge opportunity we have to live curiously. Listening – quietly – and hearing what someone has to say can ultimately be a huge time-saver in productivity and relationship dynamics. We would be wise to heed Peter Drucker’s perspective that “the most important thing in communication is hearing what isn’t said.” Sometimes we get so enthralled with how we will phrase our own opinion, response, or comment that we may have missed what is really being said!

Three tips to consider when we choose to LISTEN first:

1. Be curious

Listen for their main point.

2. Stay curious

Listen for their tone, what they might be feeling.

3. Respond informed

When they are done talking, respond with something like, “Before I reply, I want to make sure I heard what you want me to hear.  Your main point is ____________ and it seems to make you feel ___________. Did I hear you right?”

Finally, have you noticed what other word can be spelled with the letters in LISTEN?

L  I S T E N

S  I L E N T

Let this word shuffle be your cue to transform your silence into curiosity, and make the move to decrease misunderstanding and increase connection! Choose to LISTEN…. and LISTEN well!